Cablog

Can't win

An old friend rings up,

OF :(giggling) You weren't a gay-basher when we lived together,
Me : No, and I'm not now...
OF : Yes you are...
Me : No I'm not. I'm a gay supporter...
OF : No you're not. You're a gay-basher.
Me : Bullshit. I'm a poofter-basher...
OF : No you're not. You're a....what ?
Me : I'm a poofter-basher.
(pause)
OF :(giggling) I'm confused.
Me : You're French...
OF : That's rascist !
Me : Feel like a drink ?
OF : That's sexist !
Me : Yes or no ?
OF : What time ?

Can't win.

Happy Mardi Gras

Kiss, kiss, everybody - it’s Mardi Gras time in Sydney town ! We're celebrating 26 years of gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual and queer culture. Feelin’ lucky ? Then come on down. We're all waiting for youse .....

Gender Nazis

What kind of postmodernist are you!?

You are a Gender Nazi. Your boundary-crossing
lifestyle inspires awe in your friends and
colleagues. Or maybe they're just scared you
will kick their asses for using gender-specific
language. Either way, the wife-beater helps.

brought to you by Quizilla
thanks to Paul.

Crikey ! Not only am I a patronising racist pig, but also a Gender Nazi ! Perfect qualifications for a partner-bashing cross-dresser ! Maybe I should not have been so smug, on stopping for those two couples outside Erskinevilles Imperial Hotel, on Saturday evening. They could have been my sisters. Or my brothers. Or both...

Sunday night

Sunday night was a corker. 105,000 viewers at the Domain for the Tropfest Short Film gig. Another 5000(?) at Victoria Park for the Mardi Gras Fair. Also punters at Olympic Park for the Swans and shitloads at the Darling Harbour Convention Centre, for the annual Junk and Trinkets Fair.

I take a middle-aged fella from the gay Fair to Marrickville. He locks onto the ABC's Caroline Jones, on my radio. He sings the praises of Phillip Adams, assuring me that Adams is indeed alive. I tell him, 'you're a sick puppy!' When I seek his opinion of Margo Kingston, he goes into overdrive,

Mate, we've got to have some old lefties still, just to keep the home fires burning. But geez, she could use a stylist !'

Saturday night

In general, last night was a quite night for work. The afternoon mist seemed to take the edge off proceedings around town. If folk didn't get along to see David Bowie at the Entertainment Centre or the Miss Drag King at the Metro, then I guess they stayed home and watched Blokesworld.

Not surprisingly, there was heightened activity out of South Sydney, via the radio,

5.15pm - Rocks being thrown Botany & Regent Sts, Waterloo : Avoid if possible

This activity in the shopping precinct of Redfern, on a major thoroughfare, indicates an emboldened attitude from the kids. Usually they operate around Pitt and Wellington, launching rocks from behind bushes, after dark.

God's Clowns

Here’s a funny story. My girlfriend walks out of her office at lunchtime, and lights a cigarette. Immediately, a little Koori boy around 11 (my girlfriend has teenage kids, so she knows ages) asks her for a fag. ‘No, you can’t’, she replies. The kid starts following her down the main street of Port Macquarie. ‘What about when you’ve finished ?’ he asks.

She stops and turns to him, ‘What ?’ ‘Can I have that one when you’re finished ?’ he persists. My girlfriend explodes, ‘There’s no way you’re getting this, you’re too young to be smoking. Anyway, why aren’t you at school..and where’s your parents...blah, blah, blah.’ The kid looks at her blank. He hasn’t heard a word she said. So she puts her finger away, turns on her heel and walks off, disgusted. Then she hears this, ‘ I’ll give ya a root...? ’

In life, there are gems like this, and also other gems, sent by God to highlight the beauty in life. The spastic, the disabled, the blind, the deaf....those folk who remind us of our own fortune and fragility. They are not imperfect to God, being free of that which reduce us as humans. They are his beautiful playmates. They are Gods little clowns...

Loveable rascals

The tension and debate continues over the tragic accident of the Koori boy, TJ, in Redfern last weekend. He died in a spot, a stones throw from where I previously had dealings with Koori kids in touble.

Not long after the Olympics, I was gridlocked on King Street, Newtown, early one Saturday evening. I idly watched two young Koori girls use an Automatic Teller Machine, then make a beeline for my vacant cab. ‘Waterloo, mate’, came the request. Groan. Reluctantly, I headed off thinking, this could be heaven or this could be hell. Have they got any money-will I end up in the Projects-will they run...?

Redfern rocks

Last night was another great night for work, after a very busy Saturday night. This constant heat and debilitating humidity, is driving people outdoors at night, to linger around the Harbour, beaches and bars. Saturday night was the first footy match of the year. Saints, the greatest team in the world, beat the hopeless Bunnies. Poor old South Sydney. I watched their forever faithful supporters, drag themselves up Cleveland Street for the game. Only to wander despondently back down Foveaux Street, after another humiliation.

It’s been ten days of king hits for South Sydney. First, their natural representatives, the Labor Party, stole their suburban identity. Overnight, South Sydney Council was amalgamated with Sydney City Council. Then Saturday, a teenager dies in Redfern, in a bike accident, after being impaled on a steel fence post. Finally tonight, around midnight, this broadcast message comes over the cab radio :

AVOID LAWSON SQUARE AREA/ REDFERN RAIL : RIOT IN PROGRESS : POLICE etc

When this message first posted I was busy, and skimmed it only, thinking it was the regular :

AVOID WELLINGTON, PITT, COOPER STREETS REDFERN. KIDS THROWING ROCKS

It appears cabbies and bus drivers are used around town as practise for the Rock Throwing Olympics. My day driver returned the vehicle last weekend, with damage from a half-brick, hitting the door just below window level. Not far off a killer shot. Not sure where this happened though.

At 2 am I spot a flashing squad car outside Balmain Police station. The crew are helping each other into full body, riot gear. Rushing police cars wizz constantly into the City along Victoria and Parramatta Roads. Is there anything more awesome than a fully blown Commodore on the fly ? It’s a frightening spectacle, and very dangerous to unwary road users. Next comes this broadcast :

STAY AWAY FROM REDFERN ALL TOGETHER DUE TO DISTURBANCE. THANKS.

This must be sparked by the death of the kid on Saturday. I heard his Mum, who sounded like a Koori, on the radio tonight, blaming the cops for putting a chase on the boy. After her, a well-known Koori lawyer had a spray against the cops. My ears pricked at the mention of his name. I recalled once having dealings with his cousin.....or was it his cousins’ cousin ?

Industrial sabotage

Last night during the peak hour in Sydney, I found around 300 people waiting outside St. Leonards train station trying to get home, somehow. It was the same at Chatswood, North Sydney and any other major City station. What surprises me most, is not only the civility people maintain under extreme stess (thank God they were sober), but the residual empathy for train staff.

However, this empathy is fast diminishing. Far from being a vote of confidence in the rail system, this support reflects more the pathetic clinging to a belief, that industrial action is a legitimate way of solving disputes. People say to me, ‘You know, I understand that rail workers have legitimate claims, but geez, why don’t they have the guts to just strike properly and stop fucking the public around ?’.

One sick puppy

If one logs onto a site which mentions the word, 'cabbie' a lot, then one could reasonably expect to read some cab stories therein. Indeed, there's a certain fascination to reading stories of people behaving badly, which tweaks the voyeur in us all. To wit, who has walked past a sex shop and recoiled at the thought of entering, yet have no hesitation with viewing porn in private.

Here's an X-rated story which chronicles an event some time ago. It contains material which some will consider quite offensive, If you do not visit X-rated facilities, in either public or private, do not go there.........