Raunch

Recently I was approached by a commercial radio producer about going on-air and relating tales from the frontline, the raunchier the better.

"You know, like Taxicab Confessions," he suggested and I quietly groaned. He continued, "You must get propositioned by women all the time." After explaining such proposals were rare in my taxi I offered to find him another cabbie.

A few nights later I overheard the perfect conversation for 'blokey' breakfast radio. Two fellas around 30 years old travelled into the City on a Saturday night...

A: Is Thommo coming tonight?

B: Nah, he's been sin-binned by Jade.

A: Oh, what happened?

B: He and Slugga had a wanking competition at the party last week.

A: What..!?

B: They jerked-off out the backyard.

A: Ha, ha! That's gold!

B: Jade was really pissed off, though, she called him an animal.

A: Well, yeah. Fair enough...I suppose.

Pause...

A: Who won?

B: Slugga.

A: What time?

B: Forty-eight seconds.

If any cabbies feel like taking up the radio offer send me an email for the details.

Comments

[jayjay]

That IS gold!

[Craig Lucas]

Sound like a pair of f*gs

[Rainer the cabbie]

What do you mean by "only rarely" being propositioned? Everybody knows that cabbies are sex machines, especially when in a competition with a radio announcer in somebodies backyard.
Taxi cab confessions? In your dreams mate, in your dreams.

[manlycabbie]

sex for fares yeh happens all the time you just got to be under 25 and look like brad pitt.although last sat nite in the country town i sometimes work sitting on the rank outside 1 of 2 hotels in town 2 mid 20's females (very drunk) come up and say please mister taxi man we have no money can you take us somewhere,do i look like a charity,one says i'll give you a head job(very classy girl)my relpy shit get in i'm doing nothing i take you there for 2 of those beers you have(small town how long do you think before my wife would hear about the other option